Nowhere-Fast.net

I recently watched the unrated cut of Live Free or Die Hard and it was a substantially better movie then the PG-13 theatrical release.  Why?  Well, the answer is very simple and it goes to the core of the changes they made between the two releases.  See, in the unrated release John McClane says “fuck” a lot but in the theatrical cut he doesn’t.  It really does make a difference.

I’m not one for profanity for its own sake - well, not usually - but it is undeniable that a major aspect of John McClane’s character, and he is an iconic character, is that he curses happily and frequently.  It’s the sort of thing that is glaring by its absence and without it the character is completely changed.  The audience is left wondering, “hey, why isn’t John McClane swearing?”  Their next thought?  “Oh, that’s right, it’s PG-13.”  All of a sudden you’re completely out of the movie and actually thinking about the absurd “they’ve stolen our internets!” plot.  That’s not where the filmmakers want the audience to be.

Importantly, the ending of the movie had so much more impact with the inclusion of the full catch prhase.  John McClane doesn’t say “yippee kiy yay.”  He says “yippee kiy yay mother fucker.”  That’s just science.

In keeping with the music theme of yesterday’s music post, I have decided that all of the collected works of Linkin Park should be encased in concrete and dropped in the deepest part of the ocean.  And then, because the pressure at such extreme depths could crack the concrete and possibly release its content back upon the world, there should be a special fancy drill inside the concrete that starts burrowing into the earth’s crust.  Also, we should develop some technology to extract memories from people so that we can remove all knowledge that Linkin Park ever existed.

Some might say that I have an irrational hatred for Linkin Park, but to those people I say that they must not have listened to any of the “band’s” “music.”

Metallica doesn’t have a very good track record with fans who are fond of new and emerging technologies.  Just ask the guys they sued over downloaded songs.  Lately they’ve tried to present a “kinder, gentler” digital Metallica.  One must wonder, then, why they thought it wise to demand concert goers pocket cell phones in case they chose to put up “stupid YouTube videos.”  That’s not an exact quote, but it’s a pretty accurate paraphrase.

I’ve been done with Metallica for a long time.  Even before the Napster debacle I had grown bored of their music and their attitude - but, hey, they were Metallica!  There was a time whan that phrase inspired something other then a half amused chortle followed by a slow shaking of the head.

Once again, everybody loves modern technology and everyone touts the security modern technology provides, but even the most sensitive data can be compromised if it’s on a USB stick and dropped in a club.  I don’t mean to belabor the point - well OK, I sort of do - but this is another example of why we all need to assume that any information you give to any government or corporation is, potentially, common knowledge.

Also, to all you kids out there, remember that anything that you put on YouTube or MySpace is also common knowledge - so when you don’t understand why you can’t get a job you might consider that video you put online of your drunken rendition of “Paradise City” while dancing on a table.

NBC Universal owns MSNBC and News Corp owns Fox News.  At the moment both of those networks feature embarrassingly partisan prime time political coverage, they have dueling partisan asshole anchors - Olbermann for MSNBC and O’Reilly for Fox News - and they are both utterly convinced that their brand of reality is, in fact, truth.  There is a key difference between the two networks, though.  NBC Universal has the decency to be ashamed of MSNBC.

Murdoch’s News Corp shamelessly promotes the right-wing, theocratic bastion of neo-con loonies that inhabit Fox News and even does everything in its power to expand that particular brand of partisan tomfoolery (haven’t used that word in a while) to all of its other media outlets.  They are shamelessly, gleefully Republican and they adore the conservative viewers who are throwing money hand over fist at them.  They are so pathetically in the bag that they’ve traded staffers with the Bush administration.  Tony Snow, may he rest in peace, jumped from Fox to Bush and Karl Rove just recently went the other way.  Hell, Fox News is such a mindless drone of the administration that they probably get talking point faxes from the Oval Office every day.  They are the closest thing that we have to state run media and they present the ultimate example of why that is a Very Bad Thing.

See, I don’t like Fox News at all.  Neither do I like News Corp and its holdings.  MSNBC, on the other hand… I liked that station.  I really did, back in the far distant past.  Watching MSNBC these past few years has been like watching a dear friend turn from a reasonable if impassioned scholar into a raving lunatic who’s living in a windowless room with walls covered in conspiratorial scribbles.  Yes, it’s that bad.

The thing is, though, that NBC Universal doesn’t take this onboard whole-hog like News Corp.  They are left-leaning, to be sure, but they’re not the insane hippy uncle that MSNBC has become.  NBC Universal is actually trying to present a reasonable, relatively unbiased perspective and they want to extend that to their cable news network.  Apparently that has become more difficult then they originally envisioned.

All this has done to me, at the end of the day, is make me go full circle back to CNN and Mr. Passive-Aggressive, Wolf Blitzer.  Honestly, with a name like that you’d think he would have more balls.

They’re making a sequel to Tron??!?!  And it’s starring Jeff Bridges!!!?!?!!  Why has no one told me this before!!!Yes, yes, I know that I’m pathetic and a geek and all that - but this is a dream of dreams for me.  Tr2n (a swing and a miss on the name, unfortunately) trumps all other the other uber geek sci-fi, comic book and fantasy franchises combined.  That’s a lot of geek. 

Watching the speeches during the GOP convention, I can’t shake the feeling that all of the ex-candidates know that this year a Republican victory is a lost cause so they’re trying to out-bombast one another in some early 2012 campaign position jockeying.  Every single primary candidate gave a better speech in support of John McCain then they did on their own behalf during primary season.

Considering that members of the Republican party are considering throwing in the towel - privately, at least - I really am left wondering if they’re just hoping to pull a Carter/Reagan move.  They could well be banking on Obama getting elected and screwing things up so royally that voters welcome a Republican in four years.  I don’t see how they could put much stock in that theory, though - after all, Bush was reelected.  Well, Bush II was reelected.

Oh, and I do apologize for linking to YouTube.  Please, for your own sake, don’t read any of the comments.

Well, the big news is that Sarah Palin’s daughter, Bristol, is pregnant.  It really, really, really sucks for this girl that her pregnancy, something that, while probably a surprise, should still be a happy occasion, is being used as political capital by the bickering, bitter talking heads on the news channels.

I’ll be frank - I don’t like Sarah Palin because of what can be inferred about her attitude towards science due to her positions on Global Warming, evolution and reproductive education.  That alone is enough to make it very unlikely that I would ever vote for her.  Furthermore, I completely agree with the Democrat’s talking point that she is  inexperienced for the position.  Of course that doesn’t mean that she couldn’t do the job or do it well - much ado has been made of late about the relative inexperience of Lincoln when he took office and, more recently, Clinton - it just means that, for me, her inexperience is magnified considering the other negatives.

That having been said, it’s complete bullshit that her daughter is having her personal life writ large by pundits.  People have said that Palin should have considered this before accepting the nomination because the media has to deal with something like this.  That’s absolute crap.  It would be very easy to make this situation a non-issue.  Don’t fucking talk about it!  So many people are going on and on about this 17 year old girl’s choices while expressing a completely false sense of moral indignation.

The argument being raised is that a woman who promotes herself as a paragon of Christian, right wing morality - as Palin certainly does - is a hypocrite if her daughter gets pregnant as an unwed teenager.  First, the implication is that being a pregnant teenager is immoral, which is bullshit.  Second, and this is the important bit, any individual decision by a child does not necessarily reflect on the parent.  If Bristol Palin is a generally good person or a generally bad person then that does reflect on her parents.  If she makes one “bad” decision that does not reflect on her mother.  Implying that an unwed teenager must have a bad mother is offensive and fucking idiotic.

One thing that I can say about this situation, though, is that if Sarah Palin was more liberal in her views on reproductive education and reproductive rights this might not have happened.  To whit, making it known that it’s OK to use a condom.

In light of all the information and misinformation being thrown around about the Georgia situation, it’s worth noting, once again, what the current Russian government is willing to do to their citizens.

A journalist was taken into police custody for questioning and “accidentally” shot in the head and dumped out of the car.  When considering the Russian media response to the war in Georgia it is worth keeping situations like this in mind.  On a related note, Putin is claiming that the US is actually the responsible party.  That is, to any clear headed person, complete bullshit but I fully expect it to be parroted by the Russian press.  There was a period when journalism in Russia was exciting, open, honest and well and truly free.  Hell, it was probably more free then our system of consolidated mass media and countless untrained, fringe bloggers - like me.  That period is long past, though.

Speaking of journalism in the states, right now you can get by-the-minute tracking of hurricane Gustav on any of the news networks.  They eat this kind of stuff up because it actually gives them content for 24 hours.  Most events are either too quick for immediate reporting or too unpredictably and slowly developing.  Consider a war - the media can report on events that have happened, occasionally they report on things that are happening but usually they’re just waiting for something to happen.  A hurricane like this, though, is catnip for the media.  It’s steady, consistent and (relatively) predictable.  It can be tracked and updated with nice flashy graphics 24 hours a day.

I’m being cynical, I know.  Events like Gustav are important to many people and it’s important for the media to cover it.

First of all, please excuse the South Park reference.  As much as I do enjoy the show, I try to enjoy referencing it as much as possible.

On to the mini-post proper.  I was watching CNN’s coverage of the Denver Democratic National Convention moments ago and Solidat O’Brien was interviewing actor Hill Harper for some reason I cannot fathom and they had a truly pathetic exchange.  There was conversation about gas prices and O’Brien was talking about filling up a hypothetical SUV.  After making the point that gas prices have risen in the past few years (a stunning revelation, to be sure) Harper made certain that he said, in no uncertain terms “come on Solidat, I drive a Prius.”  O’Brien responded, “as do I, as do I.”

So they were talking about the average person hypothetically filling up “your” SUV but felt compelled to point out that they, of course, don’t drive one of those gas-guzzling behemoths but, instead, responsibly zip about town in their gas-sipping car-du-jour.  Could they possibly have let the moment pass without making it known to the world (well, not the world per se, but whoever happened to be watching CNN at that time) that they drive a Prius?  Of course not!  That would have meant that they skipped a chance for egotistical self-promotion!

Let me clarify a few things here.  I am, in no way, against anyone driving a Prius.  In fact, I would prefer having all the SUV drivers on the road today switch their tremendous trucks for petite Priuses.  I just don’t think that people need to tell everyone about it all the damned time.